December Giggle Blog.

Where Alan gets a dog. Now, remember back in the springtime, my plan to get a dog for his birthday fell flat, and he gave me a list of ten reasons why it wasn’t a good idea, and he was right of course, well, this is an antidote to that.

Our Son was off to work, so Alan went out to move our car to let him out. A few minutes earlier, he’s said, ‘shall we go for a lie down?’ Sometimes we go for a nap as I go out early, and he comes in late, so we have a spare hour or two together middle of the day. As I was waving our Son off to work, he was looking worried, and making a great show of pointing something out to me. It was raining, and nasty, but I ran out to see whether it was the wheelie bin tipped over in the wind, or something.

Alan was waiting for him to go, so that he could put our car back on the drive, and there was this huge rottweiler plodding down the street on his own. Not being able to resist a lonely dog, our Son jumped out of his car, and was fussing him. We know the dog; he goes in the shop down the road, (which was where he was headed by the look of it), for jelly babies, with his owner. We told our Son not to worry, and go to work, as it was nearing his start time, though he only works five minutes away.

Our car was still running, with the door open. Next minute, the hippo of a rottie heaved itself into our car, and sat on the passenger seat, filling two thirds of the front of the car. As it was raining, I thought I’d better go in, and Alan was stuck with this enormous wet dog on the front seat. What could we do? other than bring him in. From our front room, the sight of Rottie sitting happily in the front of the car, and Alan reversing up the drive was so funny I was hysterical…

Alan must have thought in the few minutes of reversing up, that he’d take the dog home. So, he went driving up the street, looking for the home of his new best friend. It crossed my mind, if anyone was passing who knew us, they might be saying, ‘Oh, that Suzy’s gone to look rough these days.’ Alan tells me all he could see was a big slobbering face, and doleful eyes inches from his face.

He found where the dog lived, but high gates were locked, so goodness knows how he got out. The neighbour told us the owners wouldn’t be back until 5 o’clock, it was only 3 o’clock by now. We asked if they’d take him in, but they said, ‘Oh, no, it won’t come to us. So, Alan brought him home. When he opened the car door, the dog wouldn’t get out. He was soaked, and had cronky joints, so he wanted to keep dry I think.

Eventually, we coaxed him out with some ham from the fridge. I dried him off, and he looked hungry. We got an old washing up bowl from the garden, and he drank 3 of those full of water, in a few minutes. Alan went off to the shop to get him a tin of meat. He returned with a bag of jelly babies, a couple of beers for himself, and chocolate for me. I said, ‘Did you get him any meat?’ That’s what he’d gone down for, but forgot. He said, ‘We were going for a lie down if you remember, only a while ago, now all of a sudden, we’re dog sitting for the afternoon.’

The dog, who we know is called Jacob, was so good, and took turns to lie by me, or go and watch Alan, with great big eyes that Alan swears were saying, ‘Thank you for looking after me.’ A man came to call for him, later, and said, ‘Thanks’ and couldn’t understand how he’d got out. A couple of nights later, a lovely lady came knocking on the door, and said, he’s called Jacob, because he’s crackers, he is her special baby, and she was so pleased he’d been safe. She gave us flowers and wine to say ‘thanks.’ At one point, he was lying on the floor, gazing up at our pictures, and beams, as if to say, ‘hmmm, I could get used to this’. He was cute, and I haven’t laughed so much for ages….. RottieAlanThe dog filled two thirds of the front of the car, then after a while, he jumped into the back, and lay down. A funnier sight I’ve never seen. That’s up in the Welsh mountains by the way, we live on a main road, in the middle of the Midlands. That’s why we couldn’t leave the big dog to roam incase he got run over. Digital imageOur eldest Son has been housesitting down in Torbay as well. I say as well, because we were dog sitting. With his house sit, a European student was included, who he had to keep an eye on, and cook tea for. I asked him if he was doing pasta, and broccoli bake with tuna and cheese sauce, things like that. He said, yes; and he also told his sister that he was relaxing in this massive house, watching footie, and having a beer, when the lad came in and began playing Motzart on the piano. Talk about chalk and cheese. He said they got on alright though, and it’s done now. More giggles next month, and don’t you love the snow effect on here for December?

Coming soon, interview with Sheila Crosby.

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Author: susanjanejones

I write articles and short stories, and this year I've become a pocket novelist for my weekly.

17 thoughts on “December Giggle Blog.”

  1. What a lovely, heart-warming post, Susan. Maybe it’s a sign? Should Alan have a dog? Mind you that would probably mean, no more midday snoozes. I love the snow effect. Wishing you a lovely December!

    1. Hi Nicola, and thanks for the December wishes. Someone else said, ‘did it make you want a dog?’ he was adamant, not that 80’s pop star I might add, with the make up:/, just adamant that we are out too much to be fair to a dog. He did love Jacob though, but I think he loves our midday snoozes more:))) Then so do I come to that.

  2. Glad you said it’s a snow effect – I thought my eyes were going funny!

    Maybe you could borrow Jacob for walks if his owners are usually out all day? Sounds as though he’d enjoy going with you.

  3. I think he would, Patsy. We seem to gather dogs along the way, other people’s I mean. Another one joined us for a walk once. Then when we’d gone so far, I felt responsible, so when we came near a road, I tied my long scarf round his neck, then I had visions of the owner coming along and saying, ‘why have you got a scarf round my dog’s neck…… the owners didn’t come though, and about two hours later, he went into his home, and she hadn’t even missed the little love. I’d nicknamed him ‘Ben’ which he answered to. So I said, ‘Is he called Ben, as he likes that name?’ She looked at me as if I was daft, and said, ‘He’s Zeus, and he’s a nuiciance.’ What a shame. Along the walk, he jumped into a canal covered in ice, and I was so worried he’d drown, I’d waded in to get him out. We must have ‘Dog lovers’ attatched to our heads I sometimes think:))))

    1. Yes, Rosemary, he was quite happy and he ate the tin of meat in two seconds flat and two mouthfuls, like, chomp, chomp, gone! We were amazed. He was so gentle for a huge dog as well. The snow effect is magical isn’t it? Every year, the wordpress people switch it on for a festive effect.

    1. I know, Keith. We often do a boiled ham, one where you cook it yourself for a couple of hours, then keep sliced in the fridge for with mash peas and parsley sauce, or ham egg and chips. He thought it was his birthday I think, when I appeared with two large slices, he soon hobbled out of the car, and followed me into the house. He went to the kitchen looking round for some more:)) Glad you popped in.

  4. Lovely story. If the dog had been a poodle or a Yorkie it wouldn’t have been nearly as funny. But a huge Rottweiler – ir couldn’t have been a better breed to give us a laugh.

  5. Lynne, talk about laugh, I almost wet myself. Seeing this macho dog and Alan in the car together, and the dog was so up close and personal because of the size of him, it was hilarious. Especially for a man who doesn’t want a dog, even though he does like dogs really. They made a lovely couple. And, you’re right. If it had been anything at all resembling a handbag dog, he’d have shooed it out of the car I think. He was a proper blokey type of dog. But he like leaning against my legs as well, and now I know what people mean by the smell of a wet dog. He’d been out in the rain for ages I think. He soon got dried off though, and cozy.

  6. Lovely heartwarming story Sue, and so funny. Having been used to cats I couldn’t believe how quickly dogs whizzed through their food. As you say chomp, chomp – gone!!

    As long as the snow stays as a special effect …………:-) Very pretty on here though xx

    1. It’s a lovely effect, Sue, isn’t it? The dog was massive, so the tin of meat was like half a sausage to him. Perhaps other dogs take more chops, but he was starving I think. He didn’t even want the jelly babies, yet he has them off the man in the local shop. I don’t think he should though, as his owner said he was diabetic. That must have been why he drank so much water. Glad you called in. xx

  7. One of your funniest Giggle Blog posts and heartwarming too. I did think that I’d been spending too long in front of the laptop when I first saw the white dots (silly me). Relieved when I realised that it was a snow effect. I want ham and parsley sauce now!

    1. Hello, Christine, great to see you on my blog, and glad you like the snowy effect. Hope you get to have your ham and parsley sauce. We’ve just had a ham and mustard sandwich for supper. It was funny. I’ll laugh for ages about that. Thanks for calling in. xx

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